Mmmm… Lazy.
109 of 250
- Old Navy tank, thrifted here– $1.95
- Black crop pants (last seen here) from Gap Body– $15
- Choker from (I think) my Uncle J’s trip home to Mumbai (Bombay)
- Black wedge sandals by Aerosoles via Ross– $17.99
So, I was all set to write about what to do on those days when you feel like wearing your less-than-flattering comfort-wear, but you don’t want to look like a total schlump, since laundry-day outfits tend to attract run-ins with long-lost, best-forgotten high-school classmates like Facebook attracts… long-lost, best-forgotten high-school classmates.
Then I saw the pictures and I thought I’d make a joke about how you can clearly see my corset– the corset that People on the Internet tell me I am wearing 24/7 because I would totally choose to have a figure that makes pants-shopping a joke, and it’s impossible to have an itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face and it’s not like there’s a song about it or anything.
THEN I went to run some errands at the closest mall (Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale, y’all– too rich for my budget, but possibly awesome for yours) and found myself explicably drawn to Frederick’s. I’ve never made a purchase from Frederick’s and I’m pretty sure I’ve never even tried anything on at Fredericks, but there I was– in Frederick’s*. Everything there looked kinda questionable, quality-wise, but they did have cheap bras up to an F-cup, so I was game. They also had– you guessed it– corsets! And by corsets, I mean cheaply-made cincher-type things with cr@ppy plastic boning. Observe:
My friend and corset aficionado (aficionada?), Deep Seam, always said she’d have my head if I bought a cheap, off-the-rack corset. According to her, they are ironically not made for women with big hips and small waists and will give us the vapors or kidney damage or something. So, not having $400 for a real, awesome, custom-made corset, I just said scr3w it and pretty much forgot about corsets altogether.
Until today, I had never even tried one on. And I’m totally not buying this thing, (and definitely not buying the bra I tried on with it). But I have been entertaining myself all afternoon looking at the photos I took because they are HILARIOUS.
To review, this is me not in a corset:
THIS is me in a corset:
LOL forever.
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*Every time I say Frederick’s, they give me $5. Frederick’s Frederick’s Frederick’s.
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- 150 of 250– And a Pretty Savvy Friday Question
- Michelle’s Pretty Year: A Thrifting Virgin’s Guide to Thrifting, Part III
1) I am a bad friend
2) You remember the old Tex Avery cartoons where the wolf would see a hot nurse or something and his jaw would drop to the ground and steam came out of his ears and his eyes turned to hearts and his heart popped out of his chest and sounded like a jazz drummer? That’s pretty much what happened when I saw the photo of you in the corset from behind. Don’t show that pic to Sir-Mix-Alot or he’ll drop dead from a heart attack
You are the awesomest woman I know for posting those pictures! Compare that to the website model photo and anyone could understand why real women are ironically the ones who don’t buy corsets. But it does give me more insight into the bustle-dress phenomenon. That last picture just screams for a bustle dress!
I don’t know, that corset/bra combo kind of makes you look like a superhero…all you need is tights and a cape.
daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn
Butch, hahaha!
Likeawoman,
mlshiira, You’re right– seems like certain undergarments go with certain clothing items like peas and carrots.
Brigitte– I could be… Boobwoman! I’d carry a measuring tape in my utility belt and direct people to better fitting bras.
I agree on the superwoman thing. When talented art nerds sit in their mom’s basement drawing fictional women for their comic books it’s your body they are imagining.
First of all….these are some of the best “face pictures” I think you’ve had lately. You look extra refreshed and happy!
Also, I bought a cheapo Frederick’s corset once (for, ahem, some private fun time) but IMO it doesn’t actually take your waist in at all, it just is kind of for looks. An actual corset (I have one from Vollers) is worlds different and I think it you wore one of those, it would be totally bananas.
Thanks, Kelly! I would really love to try a real corset sometime… Maybe next year my budget will allow it.
Whoa! That corset is taking your curves to a whole other layer of the atmosphere.
And LOL, this is what happens when adolescent girls who haven’t come to terms with their own bodies (let alone anyone else’s) and worship at the altar of Chictopia are allowed to have opinions.